A Day in the Life in Silicon Valley

[Inspired by http://bit.ly/p35h8Y. Originally posted on Google+.]

My alarm clock goes off. Well, it’s not really an alarm clock, because clocks are analog and made of wood and aren’t synched to anything. What wakes me up is something that has a passing visual similarity to an alarm clock, with hands and everything, but it’s a GUI for a program on one of my various devices that checks in with something on the internet that can tell the absolute correct time anywhere with atomic precision, which – let’s face it – is better. Let’s just call it an alarm.

My hand navigates to the device channeling the alarm so that I can shut it off. I am cocooned by several devices with enough computing power to guide several nuclear missiles simultaneously, but it doesn’t confuse me because they are all synched to the cloud, and any change I make on one of them is instantly reflected on all of them.

I start to check Gmail on my phone, then realize I also have my tablet handy and switch to that. Some emails from Linkedin and other random messages (maybe from my family, who realize I can only be contacted by email), but I get distracted by a red notifications box.

I check Google Plus – for an hour.

I take a shower and dress. Apparently it’s gorgeously sunny outside again. That’s cool, I guess. I put on a t-shirt and jeans, because anything dressier or slightly uncomfortable looking would be out of place at work.

I check Google Plus again on my desktop before I leave. A desktop is nice to have, too. You know, for gaming and stuff.

I pack up my company laptop, which is lying on the floor from working until late last night.

I drive my silver Prius to work. Parking is a bit of a hassle. The sun beats down on my head as I hurry inside to glorious air conditioning.

I check Google Plus. I love cat pictures and stimulating intellectual discussion about Google Plus.

There’s a very complicated coffee machine that I use in the kitchen, one of several in the building. It’s next to the fridge filled with soda and juice and the boxes of granola and chocolate bars. I can steam milk with this thing! Who needs Starbucks?

If my job does not specifically involve computer programming, it involves making sure that programmers can do their job efficiently. I creatively clear obstacles for them. I work very hard.

Why do people say that there’s no content on Google Plus? I follow like 30 Googlers on it and those folks alone are posting stuff all the time … about Google Plus. People just need to understand Circles better. I still don’t get Sparks, but don’t tell anyone.

I check TechCrunch. Man, apps are where it’s at. This graph with the curvy upward line says so. Look at how many people love Angry Birds! I secretly despise Angry Birds, but it’s a great use case for showing other people that apps are the future. I would definitely use more apps if I weren’t working all the time.

The Google Plus app is gorgeous. Zuckerberg must know about how superior it is to the Facebook app. Why doesn’t Zuckerberg post anything?

I think about the Singularity. We have to be close to it, right? I bet Silicon Valley will be the first in. Sweet.

I hear someone talking about reality TV. They must not be a programmer. Back to Google Plus.

Occasionally I will post something to a specific circle, just for the novelty of it, but I mostly like lurking on +Vic Gundotra’s posts and seeing how fast the comments come in. I wish I could get into a Hangout with +Bradley Horowitz, but I know I won’t be able to check my hair fast enough. Ever. 😦

I have lunch at work. I have dinner at work. The people who commute from SF are all out by 5:30, probably because they do things like go to tiny bars to drink overpriced organic handcrafted beers with each other. I am secretly envious.

I drive home – it might still be a bit light out, but probably not. I bring my company laptop home. There are still bugs to triage.

I check the Onion and maybe watch a bit of the Daily Show. This is basically what I need to be aware of the world, although Google Plus takes care of most of that. Hey, a cat!

I check Facebook and Twitter on my netbook in bed, just out of morbid curiosity. They’re talking about reality TV or something. Meh. Facebook is just a fad, anyway.

I contemplate the cloud as I drift off in electronic serenity. The cloud has my alarm. It has my back.

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